I’m so glad that I get to share this Infertility Survivor Story with you today! Annie and I became “blog friends” after we came across each other’s infertility blogs a little over a year ago. Annie is an artist and graduate of Arizona State University while her husband Stephen is a successful pharmacist. The infertility journey they have traveled has been a long and hard one, so I was extremely excited for them when Annie announced their miracle baby was on the way! Sweet baby L was born just a few months ago. I feel so lucky that I moved from out of state to the Phoenix area where Annie’s family lives so that I could meet them in person and photograph the love these parents have for each other and for the baby girl they waited so long to meet. It’s truly an honor to share their infertility story and family photos with you today! I hope their story will bring comfort and hope to anyone else out there struggling with infertility.
Annie & Stephen’s Infertility Survivor Story
written by Annie
When we were married eight years ago, we never thought it would take so long for us to have children. Throughout the years as we tried to have children we did all we could to get the medical help we both needed, not only to be healthy but fertile. After seven years of infertility and a diagnosis of PCOS, we turned to a fertility clinic in Tempe, and ended up winning a raffle for a free IVF cycle! We were shocked and scared to see how the treatment would go–little did we know at the time that it would actually work! We are over the moon to have our baby girl in our arms now!
What would you say was the hardest thing about infertility?
It’s difficult to pick one hardest thing about infertility so here are some things that I struggled with as a result of infertility: the process of giving up your body to the drugs, the treatments, and the endless shots. I don’t have a high threshold to pain and struggled emotionally to get through this. Seeing others get pregnant before me was really hard–it sounds selfish I know, I admit I was very selfish. I wanted to be able to have children so bad that I turned into a green-eyed monster when invited to baby showers and other get-togethers with pregnant family members. I have three sisters-in-law and one of them was pregnant every year for eight years. That’s eight children we watched others in our family receive from the time we were married and started struggling with infertility–oh my goodness it was hard, and I wasn’t always the nicest person to them.
How has your perspective changed as a parent?
My view has changed tremendously as a parent! In order to take care of a newborn, my needs are put on the back burner or even not on the stove at all–in fact, right now I’m typing this with one hand while holding my baby because she cries when I put her down! But it is worth it! Motherhood it is trying and pushes your patience, but when you get your baby to smile at you it is all worthwhile…the barf in the hair, the leaky shirts, the poop on the carseat, the two hours of sleep a night. I feel that infertility prepared me to be a parent because it made me realize that trials are a part of life and that nothing comes easy. Infertility and IVF also prepared me to handle the discomforts of pregnancy and labor. I never thought I would labor for 36 hours before delivering!
Is there anything you wish people who don’t struggle with infertility knew?
There are so many things I wish people that don’t struggle with infertility knew, mainly: STOP GIVING ADVICE! No, I don’t want to adopt, no I don’t want to get drunk to have a baby, and stop asking me when I am going to have children. Adoption is not a band-aid for infertiles, a lot of people think this and it is simply not true. Adoption can be the right choice but for Pete’s sake let them come to that decision don’t offer it or force it upon them. I chewed someone’s head off for asking me when we were going to have children, basically asked them if they wanted a call every time we “tried,” lol!
What advice would you give to someone who is currently going through infertility?
The advice I would give to someone that is currently struggling with infertility is ask for help, turn to people that love you and understand you, and try—try so hard to be nice to pregnant people because as an infertile we tend to think, “Oh, I will never complain as a pregnant woman! I will cherish every minute of it!” Needless to say I didn’t keep that vow as a pregnant woman, I complained, I got angry, and wasn’t always cherishing every moment. But there were many wonderful moments that melted my heart and caused me to praise Heavenly Father for allowing me to carry her for nine months.
Thanks so much to Annie and Stephen for sharing their story! You can get to know them better and read more about their infertility and IVF journey on Annie’s blog,
Fertile Findings, or on
Annie’s Instagram.